Pending Invasion of Hordes of Happy Wahabi’s?

Bernard+Hogan+Howe+gD2eflT9FU3mHas anyone ever involved you in a car crash intentionally? I ask this because these days in Harrow, the likelihood of an intentionally caused, unintentional road traffic accident is something of a hazard. Not that you’d guess it from the ‘all is well we’ve got it all under control’ reporting of the local police. First the fraudster selects her victim, and then she facilitates the collision (usually at a roundabout or on a nice quiet though very long road).

The victim flummoxed and confused climbs slowly out of the car to be well-met by a casual passer-by (the fraudster’s mate). Before you know it the victim has taken the blame for an accident they didn’t cause and all parties wander off happy and relieved. The victim is relieved because nobody died, the fraudster because they’re about to receive a payday boost. Now, I know this because some Hackney Cab drivers told me. The police also know this but they haven’t shared their pearl of wisdom with the general public, because ‘all is well in Harrow’.

It’s kind of like the drone helicopters they told us about, after they’d raided a couple of houses for cannabis and illegal migrant workers. Here we are believing that they’re assiduously hunting down nefarious criminals, when in reality they’re out and about pursuing some Neo-Con agenda. Which brings me back to my favourite police officer, and yours, Sir Bernard Hogan-Howe.

For Sir Bernard has expressed considerable concern….about Iraq. He is dreadfully worried that the hordes of happy Wahabi’s (yes, that is what they are calling them), will be happy no longer once Iraq gets its land back. Indeed they may become so unhappy that they decide to quit the sunny climes of Iraq and jump on a Virgin Airways plane straight back to England. In his words ‘Should there be large numbers returning it puts great pressure on all of us to make sure that we’re kept safe’. Note those words ‘all of us’ I take it he’s referring to the Neighbourhood Champions (one wonders if he will be handing out tasers and truncheons), and not just the Taxpayer salaried forces of law and order.



Austere Oral Reforms

Bernard+Hogan+Howe+gD2eflT9FU3mSo I told you that we needed to be honest about dealing with the debt crisis and that doing so would mean police spending cuts. But I also told you that as Home Secretary I would be tough on crime, I would give you the powers you need to get the job done, and, as a government, we would do everything possible to maintain a strong police presence on our streets. I know many of you were sceptical. I know you meant it when you said that spending cuts would destroy the police as we know it, that the front line service would be ruined and that crime would go shooting up….and I want to take this opportunity too to remember the officers who have fallen while on duty in the last year. PC Shazahan Wadud; DC Adrian Grew; PC Andrew Duncan; and PC Mick Chapman They died serving their communities, and we honour their memory.

– Home Secretary Teresa May’s Police Federation 2014 Speech

Welcome to the Metropolitan Police Force’s new approach to making our local streets safer. Working in partnership (don’t you just love that phrase?), with our local councils, housing associations and the Department For Work & Pensions the police are smashing high level criminal gangs. High level criminals, living in our dwindling council housing and housing association supplies? High level?

I kid you not, we the general public are supposed to be profoundly reassured by the Metropolitan Police Force’s new cost-effective approach to policing. We’re not supposed to wonder why they would choose to attack crime by flinging back into our jail cells those petty thieves who have only recently been flung out of them. We’re not supposed to ponder the wisdom of raiding ‘Homes-in-Multiple-Occupation’ because of the poorly researched belief that the migrant workers living in them are drug dealers, as well as petty thieves.

Nor are we supposed to ponder the efficacy of trumpeting one’s triumphant drug raids one minute, whilst claiming that the neighbourhoods you’re policing have no appreciable drug problem the next (please see Harrow Observer). Nope, we’re supposed to be exceedingly grateful for this new cost cutting approach. That, and the increasingly significant role being played by Neighbourhood Champions in London Boroughs that were once very effectively and proudly policed.

Remember Sir Bernard Hogan-Howe? Britain’s toughest and most demanding Police Commissioner? Appointed as Commissioner of the Metropolitan Police in September 2011, he reflected the Home Secretary’s desire to find a “single-minded crime fighter” to lead the police force.

He is the man who introduced the Met to the slogan “Total Policing”, a mix of zero-tolerance policing and care for victims. And now the man reduced to voicing a 101 answerphone message, which reassures potential victims of crime, that their ‘non-emergency call’ will be dealt with in due course. And after you’ve listened to that, try listening to the voice of a belligerent police officer, as he or she strives aggressively to persuade you that your ‘non-emergency’ phone call is actually no policing matter of any sort.

The Little Book of Big Scams launch